My maa

Main kabhi batlata nahi, par andhere se darta hu main maa.. Main kabhi dikhlata nahi par teri parvaah karta hu main maa.. tuze sab hai pata hai na maa.. Mom knows everything. I dont have to tell her when i am feeling low. I dont have to spell it out when i am happy. She knows. She simply does. I so vividly remember the day she left me for the first time. At the COEP hostel gate. She was standing under the street lamp, waiting for me to turn around, but i did not.. coz i did not want her to see my tears.. tears of the daughter whom she thought was always the bravest of her kids. I cried in the bathroom everyday for a month after that.. i also came back running home to her.. i crept in her room @ four in the morning and cried to her saying i never wanted to go back... I cried on the phone. i cried all the time. The change was so difficult to take. her bravest daughter was the weakest indeed.. I missed her all these years.. Its been more than six years since that evening under the streetlight when she bade me good bye for the first time.. when this home became a vacation home for me.. but even after all these years i still miss her everytime i am away from her.. I still cry myself to sleep at times.. I still call up to cry to her at times.. i dont care if she thinks her bravest daughter has failed her.. afterall i feel she always knew i wasnt the bravest afterall and so she always made me think i was.. so that i would indeed be brave.... I miss her all the time.. All the time...