As a woman in a highly demanding and rewarding job; having a baby may seem like a break - one that can set you back by atleast a few years even if you resume work as soon as your maternity leave ends, because mothering does not end with maternity leave.
From this side, I can clearly recall my dilemma when I wondered the need for a child. Then, a baby for me meant a break in the career for which I had worked so hard. A baby meant never again, atleast for a few years, being able to put in those crazy hours at work. And I did love my work.
(There were other non-work related reasons too for the dilemma. But this post is not about those)
(There were other non-work related reasons too for the dilemma. But this post is not about those)
But now on this side, here are a few reasons which would have made my decision a little easier and the break look a little less like a 'break' -
2. A baby is the best motivation, beyond any self-help book.
My baby for me is someone who is continuously watching me, imitating me, and learning from me. So even if he is not around I want to do the right thing. I will be his role model atleast for some years. I want the model to be good.
My baby taught me patience, anger management, rational thinking, standing up for self and others, speaking up and accepting things I cannot change.
A lot of which that the non-mother me always wanted to learn but had never managed to.
My baby for me is someone who is continuously watching me, imitating me, and learning from me. So even if he is not around I want to do the right thing. I will be his role model atleast for some years. I want the model to be good.
My baby taught me patience, anger management, rational thinking, standing up for self and others, speaking up and accepting things I cannot change.
A lot of which that the non-mother me always wanted to learn but had never managed to.
3. Mothering, especially after I resumed work, made me realise that I am a superwoman.
Before my baby, a hectic day at work would mean that I would flop on the sofa and do nothing till bed time. Sleep for 8 hours straight and go back to work still reeling from the effects of the previous hectic day.
After baby, a typical day is atleast twice as tough as the then hectic day, and the sleep hours are about 6 with atleast 2-3 sessions of diaper change / feed / water.
Yet I have managed to make very important presentations the next day and managed pretty well.
I never really knew I was capable of stretching myself so much. But I now know. And my baby will not forever be so demanding (atleast in terms of the physical effort required of me).
And then, I know I will be able to pull off much more than the non-mother me was ever capable of :-)
Before my baby, a hectic day at work would mean that I would flop on the sofa and do nothing till bed time. Sleep for 8 hours straight and go back to work still reeling from the effects of the previous hectic day.
After baby, a typical day is atleast twice as tough as the then hectic day, and the sleep hours are about 6 with atleast 2-3 sessions of diaper change / feed / water.
Yet I have managed to make very important presentations the next day and managed pretty well.
I never really knew I was capable of stretching myself so much. But I now know. And my baby will not forever be so demanding (atleast in terms of the physical effort required of me).
And then, I know I will be able to pull off much more than the non-mother me was ever capable of :-)
4. Sensitive me.
I was always pretty sensitive to people, to sufferings of people, towards the environment.
A baby however has shown me a completely different level of sensitivity. These days, I certainly show much more regard to trees, plants, animals. Towards underprivileged kids or tragedies. I smile more at strangers, I befriend them more. The world overall seems like a kinder place and I WANT to make it a kinder and nicer a place.
I was always pretty sensitive to people, to sufferings of people, towards the environment.
A baby however has shown me a completely different level of sensitivity. These days, I certainly show much more regard to trees, plants, animals. Towards underprivileged kids or tragedies. I smile more at strangers, I befriend them more. The world overall seems like a kinder place and I WANT to make it a kinder and nicer a place.
5. Awareness
A lot of self-awareness gyaan revolves around how we 'look' and don't really 'see'.
Or how we 'hear' and don't 'listen'.
Well, I now notice every small thing and noise. I never knew that a concrete mixer was so fascinating nor had I realised how super cute an autorickshaw really looks.
But now I notice. I know how to 'see'.
A lot of self-awareness gyaan revolves around how we 'look' and don't really 'see'.
Or how we 'hear' and don't 'listen'.
Well, I now notice every small thing and noise. I never knew that a concrete mixer was so fascinating nor had I realised how super cute an autorickshaw really looks.
But now I notice. I know how to 'see'.
There is of course the tough stuff to this. A baby does test you in more ways than you could imagine.
But apart from the sentimental reasons, above reasons surely make a great case for that tiny career break. Consider that as an education sabbatical. Afterall you certainly do emerge out of it smarter, better, and more awesome.
But apart from the sentimental reasons, above reasons surely make a great case for that tiny career break. Consider that as an education sabbatical. Afterall you certainly do emerge out of it smarter, better, and more awesome.
PS:
The no 1 reason will always be -
The no 1 reason will always be -
1. One more person to love you. Fiercely.
Can you ever have enough people who love you like crazy?
Having one more certainly makes life awesome :-)
Can you ever have enough people who love you like crazy?
Having one more certainly makes life awesome :-)
