When your heart is turmoil 

 and your head a mess

 

when they both aint going in the same direction

 and all is a chaos...

 when you know you have got to do it,

 but you do not know how...

 when you grapple for support outside

 with a realisation however 

 that strength has to be seeked from within...

 when your heart bleeds to know

 what all you have to leave

 when memories kill you

 and the mere idea brings tears

 when you know it is not an end to one thing

 but many a things

 and you wonder what scares you more- 

 a life without it 

 or a life with its haunting memories..

 when you wish there was something, anything

 that would make this simpler

 which would pull you out

 without making you find that inner strength to do it

 Coz the inner strength shall not manifest itself,

 for, for long it has been derived from the very thing it now has to kill...

 complicated though it sounds

 it is as simple as that,

 An end to a lot of beautiful things

 A beginning to the unknown...

Post long overdue

Since the last post and this, a lot has happened. Life has been rocking…

To list a few things, won strategym, celebrated yet another Diwali,wrote an exam, saw Mumbai shake with terror... lots of things.

 At each time thought of posting something, but it was one of those times when your brain is all so messed up that writing sounds like too much effort...

But it has now become a vicious circle i think. brain muddled -> i dont write -> brain stays muddled.... so gonna write.

 The things that happened....

1) Strategym win: A proud moment of course and as rathi says, it took a long time to come…

2) Diwali: Well, I am in love with this festival since 4th standard. This was the year when my and mom’s annual diwali ritual of visiting main road started. We would make a shopping list and go to main road. The list included small small rather insignificant things like rangoli colors to laxmi pavla stickers…
but i used to so look forward to those trips, I still do.
The enthusiasm there is in the air…With its twisting narrow lanes jam packed with people and all the lights and colours and overall festive mood it is simply awesome… Lights, colors, crackers and puja… I just love festivals and this one in particular. This diwali I kept wondering as to where will I be for the next diwali????

 3) Exam: hmmm… Now these were amazing too. I don’t remember writing any examination paper in my life without reading a word about the subject matter.

I did it this time and I have reasons to believe I have fared pretty well! Oddly actually, exam time was when I believe we actually got some time to relax in our otherwise hectic time… (another benefit of being in marketing)

 4) Loads of presentations: The less we talk about them the better it is.

 5) Mumbai attacks : Howmuchever we talk about these is less.

A slap not on the politicians face but on the innocent citizens who are being made a fool of by the underqualified, undeserving people who are supposedly governing our nation.

Lack of capability is sickening and worse still when such people lead us, it is like making a jackass out of the educated, innocent Indian.

I believe Mumbai has finally awakened.

I never really was proud of the ‘Spirit of Mumbai’ coz more than the spirit it was indifference when people got back to their routine without so much as a genuinely angry retort against the politicians.

But this time around it is different. Somehow there is a feeling of ‘enough is enough’ and I hope it leads to some solid results.

I hate to say this, but finally things will move… coz US will make them move.

Another mockery of the biggest democracy of the world.

 PS: A lot to come. Now I am gonna BEBO  (for all those blogging illiterate folks out there, it means Blog Early, Blog Often)…

phew, kept my promise alright :)